I’m desperately trying not to make every entry on this blog a review. Although I love reviewing things, I feel like it just doesn’t make for very exciting or intriguing reading day after day. As such, I feel like I should use this blog as an actual journal for a moment. A few things have been on my mind lately and I feel like I should vent a little.
One of the reasons I canceled Daffy Reviews, my video review show, was because I just wasn’t getting any feedback on it. Sure, I had friends that watched it regularly, but I didn’t feel like the show was giving me any sort of satisfaction. Granted, this wasn’t the sole reason for the show’s cancellation. But it was a pretty big one for me.
As I stated in a past blog on TGWTG, when I started blogging in 2008, I did so because I wanted to be a part of something more. I wanted to start my own community. I wanted to be popular. Some might find this reason to be a bit selfish. While I agree, that doesn’t change the fact that it was one of my drives to blog. Over time, when I became a video reviewer, I just realized that I wasn’t getting the kind of feedback that I was hoping for. People seemed to like me for a time, but I think my bit got old quickly. Before I decided to cancel Daffy Reviews, I had a talk with my editor and girlfriend, Laura. It’s a talk that, even while we put together a new video show, I still have with her. It goes something like this.
Me: Why are we even doing this series? Nobody other than our friends are watching.
Laura: Uh… Because it’s fun. We have fun making it. Right?
My main argument during these talks was basically “Yeah, it’s fun, but what’s THE POINT if nobody watches?” (See what I did there? Title drop. You’re welcome.)
Cut to this blog. This one, the site you are reading right now. As I’ve said multiple times, this blog started as a school assignment. But I love to write and decided to use this assignment as an excuse to start my own little website for myself. And there’s the revelation. I didn’t do it for fans, or to get views, or to become popular. I did it for myself. Because it was fun. In fact, I realize something now that I type this.
The Nostalgia Critic didn’t start his show to become popular. Linkara isn’t breaking down comics week after week just because it’s livelihood (though I’m sure that’s a driving factor). The Angry Video Game Nerd didn’t start cursing a blue streak at bad video games to gain a fan base. They did it because they had fun. They wanted to create something that was fun.
I may have started blogging for the wrong reasons. I may have started a review show just because I thought it would be a good way to get views. But as time went on, as I kept making stuff, I realized that I don’t write and make videos just to be popular anymore. I do it because it’s fun. Because I have fun making it. I tried making videos with the purpose of becoming popular and all it got me was stressed out and depressed about myself. I can’t do that anymore. I WON’T do that anymore.
I realize now that Laura is right. (Get used to that phrase, it’s gonna probably crop up a lot through the years.) Trying to be popular isn’t what’s important. Having fun is.
While I will always appreciate getting views and feedback, I’m not writing this blog or making videos for “them.” I’m doing it for me. I’m doing it for the fun of it. And, already, I’m a happier man.