Daffy Reviews: What Could Have Been

(This post is much longer than usual.  I apologize.)

First off, I’d like to apologize for my lack of a blog the past couple of weeks.  I was on vacation and then I felt a bit unmotivated to write anything.  It happens to me occasionally.  Still, my lack of motivation cut into Halloween in June: Reader Beware Month Returns.  So, in order to make up for it, I will extend Reader Beware Month into next month.  I will have 2 to 3 blogs a week revolving around that subject.  The reason for this is to both make up for my lack of updates lately and to offset Christmas in July (one of the banes of my existence) at least a little bit.  Anyway, on to the actual blog of the day!

A few weeks ago, I got a message from the video hosting website, Blip, that my show, Daffy Reviews, was going to be purged from their systems.  Seems I don’t meet whatever quality they’re trying to uphold on their website.  I’m perfectly fine with this.  I haven’t made a Daffy Reviews video since I canceled it last year.  I still think it’s bullshit that they are actively kicking people off of their website, but that’s neither here nor there.  Still, the news has got me reminiscing about the good times I had making videos.  I remembered the jokes I used to make, the fun I used to have shooting the eps, the pain Laura went through editing the things.  Mostly, though, I was remembering the stories I used to put into my reviews.

Inspired by Atop the Fourth Wall (where bad comics burn), I decided to put elements into my show that hinted at and, mostly, outright told an overarching story.  The story involved demons, mobsters, genies, love potions, undead monsters, and mostly a lot of me wearing different costumes.  Still, the stories were fun to think up and plan out.  Unfortunately, after cancelling Daffy Reviews, I have a few plotlines lying around that simply do not make any sense to put anywhere.  Even if I do end up starting a new video review show (I’m thinking about it), I want to start fresh, without forcing people to watch my old stuff.  Hell, after Blip is done purging my show, the old stuff is going to disappear anyway.  (Sidepoint:  I announced this on Twitter, but I have no plans to post my old videos anywhere.  Don’t really see the point in doing it for a series I no longer make.  As such, if you wish to watch these before they disappear, go ahead and view them at my Daffy Reviews blip channel.  If you want to download them to watch in the future for whatever reason, feel free to do so!)

In light of all that, I feel like sharing with the world the plot lines that would have been in Daffy Reviews Seasons 3 and 4.  (I didn’t plan to end it in Season 4, but I didn’t plan further ahead than that either.)  This is mostly for all those curious enough to want to know what would have happened.  However, if you’ve never watched any of my stuff before, a lot of this won’t make sense unless I explain the stories of Seasons 1 and 2.  If you watched those and still remember them, feel free to skip the next 2 paragraphs.

Season 1 (aka Rise of Shadow Daffy):  Season 1 started off with me (Daffy) hiring Laura, the head of the Channel Awesome Wiki, to become my editor for my new review show!  The first half of the season revolved around her trying to make my life harder out of spite from all the extra work she had to do with my videos.  During this time, I accidentally freed a demon that was trapped in a book.  The demon was somehow able to possess me, or rather, was able to possess a repressed evil alter ego of myself known as Shadow Daffy, thus taking the name for himself as well.  He only had control over my body whenever I was sleeping or wasn’t paying attention.  However, he wanted complete control over me.  So, in an effort to confuse me, Shadow Daffy sent Laura a love potion and made her fall in love with me.  Our relationship started to grow and Shadow Daffy realized that he also wanted to control the Channel Awesome Wiki.  While me and Laura were distracted, he went around killing all the other contributors for the Wiki.  Amidst all this, I came into possession of a genie.  Anyway, Shadow Daffy eventually figured out that he had to make me go completely insane in order to fully possess me.  He cast a spell that forced Laura and I to sing out our inner-most feelings.  This caused us to get into a fight and Laura to leave me.  Feeling utterly alone as Laura was gone and my friends had died, I went insane, which gave Shadow Daffy full power.  Laura eventually came back looking to talk and saw Shadow Daffy had taken over.  She was able to fight him and send him back to Hell, but learned that her love for me came from a potion.  In the aftermath, she decided that we needed to break up in order for her to figure out her own true feelings.  Thus ends Season 1.

Season 2 (aka Wannabe Freddy/Christmas Blues/Battle for the Lamp):  The first episode of Season 2 had all my friends coming back from the dead in one undead form or another (for example, one was a zombie, another a Poe from Legend of Zelda, another a Black Lantern) and attacking me, blaming me for their untimely demise.  After tricking my genie into giving me unlimited wishes, I wished all of them back to life.  Afterwards, I started being haunted by a being who called himself my own personal “spirit of Halloween” and whom I called Wannabe Freddy (because he dressed like Krueger).  He forced me to confront 3 of my fears and, afterwards, reminded me that I was still going to be alone for Christmas.  Feeling bummed, Laura attempted to cheer me up which ultimately lead to us getting back together.  In the second “half” of the series, a mobster named Stu tried multiple times to get his hands on my genie’s magic lamp.  This lead to a battle where Stu was defeated.  The season ended as Stu reported to a being with a red demonic hand (a being who seemed to be his boss) and was slaughtered for his incompetence.  Also, Laura decides to live with me for a while.

Alright! Onward to new territory!

Season 3 (Daffy’s Year of Fear):  As you may know if you watched the single episode I put out for Season 3, the season was going to be known as Daffy’s Year of Fear where I was to review something related to the Horror genre in honor of Halloween for a whole year.  At the end of the episode, you may remember Laura hearing the echoey sound of evil laughter.  Well, the rest of the season would have had Laura keep seeing signs of Shadow Daffy’s return.  She would continually have conversations with characters who would turn out to be hallucinations.  I, of course, wouldn’t see any of the signs and would be questioning her at every corner.  Paranoid, she would have decided to go back home until she could figure out what was going on.  After she departed, “I” would start seeing signs of Shadow Daffy, wondering if I was going to go evil again and getting more and more paranoid as a result.  The season would have culminated in a twist:  Shadow Daffy WASN’T coming back.  Rather, it was all the machinations of… Wannabe Freddy, who had been gaining more and more power thanks to the year long celebration of Halloween, feeding on mine and Laura’s fears.  As he attempts to destroy me, I would figure out a way to destroy him:  By feeding him so much fear that he destroys himself with power.  Thus, I make myself afraid of absolutely everything and Wannabe Freddy (whose real name we never truly learn, but we do learn that he is a demon of Halloween) would be destroyed.  However, the season would have ended with the realization that, because of my mental battle with the Halloween demon, I had amnesia, remembering nothing of who I or anyone else was.  We also would have learned that the Halloween demon worked for the boss with the demonic hand from the end of last season.

Season 4 (aka Daffy’s Memory):  Season 4, though I did plan it out a bit, isn’t as planned out as Season 3 was.  Season 4 would have been about rebuilding Daffy’s memory.  I would have talked about books, movies, and games that people told me that I had loved and such.  I would also come across an old book, a journal with drawings and writings.  It would have been similar in structure to Charmed’s Book of Shadows or Buffy’s Vampyr book.  Daffy would then read about his ancestors, a colorful assortment of characters such as a knight from old England, a pirate, a cowboy, and a bunch of other cliches.  He would have also learned about an ancient being that each of his ancestors were forced to deal with.  The being would have been known as Dardanos, or He of the Red Hand, or the Devourer.  This season wouldn’t have had a major villain.  Rather, it would be about Daffy trying to remember who he was and, at the same time, try to build himself up to become something more, a hero, someone who can face this threat and try to beat it for good.  The season would have ended with Daffy finally remembering himself and vowing to start becoming a “true hero.”

I hadn’t thought farther ahead than this but I did know this would all culminate in a battle between Daffy and Dardanos (a word I came across once that means “devourer”) probably by the end of Season 6.

Anyway, that’s about it.  That’s the entire story of Daffy reviews.  I admit, parts of it are a bit overly convoluted.  Some of it doesn’t make sense, some of it is stupid, a lot of it is made up of cliches.  Still, it was my story and I was proud of it.  I’m happy I could finally tell the world about it.  Feel free to tell me what you thought of it.  In the meantime, I’m going to keep thinking about making videos again.  Who knows?  Maybe I’ll actually start doing something.  Or maybe I’ll just be lazy as always.  Either way, see you next time!

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